The Importance of Perspective

A single isolated act can be a dangerous trigger for change.

I know that personally.  An extended time of productive experience could potentially be undermined by a single act, a solitary decision.

If I let it.

I will not.  A reflective view of history reminds me of the multiple benefits and blessings I've received in this setting.  Kindness, love and support have been offered without solicitation.  I have been the recipient of much mercy and grace.

What is required is perspective.  What is the larger picture?  What has been the general modus operandi in my experience here?  Are there factors of which I may not be aware that could have been a catalyst for such a decision?

Singular events can make you feel like quitting.

Perspective--the broader picture--can save you from sudden change and concomitant bitterness.

Stay the course.  Don't pull the trigger.

The Fine Art of Relaxing

For some of us, relaxing is a guilt trip.  Motivated and compelled to work and be productive,m anything short of that feels wrong.

I am in the middle of a two week vacation in Arizona, watching my beloved San Francisco Giants in spring training and 80 degree weather.  This would seem like a perfect environment for relaxation.

And it is.  Except for my brain which remains in work mode.  I have to be intentional to and set boundaries for myself or I will be subconsciously swept into a labyrinth of work-related concerns.

Each morning to a relaxed time with my wife of visiting, doing our devotions together--we do this at home, but the pace here is much more subdued.  Each morning we take an hour hike--one morning we were out for two and a half hours climbing a mountain!--and this is a time for us to view the beauty of the desert, an acquired taste we have developed over the last 6-7 years,

I have my I-Phone with me at all times.  My world is carried on this small magical portable computer.  Sadly, I am a creature of habit and I find myself reaching for it throughout the day to catch up on news, contacts, sports scores, work-related concerns (my staff at home work to shield me from these), and family updates.  With eleven grandchildren, there is always something new to know about their personal worlds.

In the evenings my mind defaults to work mode, and so I have to "busy" myself with games, conversations (we are traveling with some very close friends), and an occasional television show like American idol (I know...it's crazy!)

We will be home in a week and the temptation is to begin to transition already into work mode, i.e. What do I have waiting for me?  What work projects need to be tackled?

Et cetera

But I am relaxing.  And loving it.

It is a fine art I want to learn to incorporate into my regular life.

I am open to advice on how to do that more effectively as the allure of semi-retirement awaits me!

Decompressing

I recently left on a  twenty-one day trip, focusing on Spring Training for the SF Giants in Scottsdale, Arizona.  Joined by our friends, Jerry and  Sue, we left Sunday after church and arrived here Tuesday evening.

Tired and up tight.

It takes me awhile to unwind and to decompress.  There us a interim period of time where I am putting all my work and worry aside--intentionally--and setting my mind on rest and relaxation.

Usually, arriving at that place requires a dismissal of pseudo guilt (I'm abandoning my work!), .a denial of my messianic complex (How will they survive without me?) and a detour from my penchant for being a workaholic (Where's my IPhone?).

Thankfully, my wife willingly assists me in this process!

So here's the deal.  I am going to five Giants' games in two weeks.

But, I am sleeping in, taking long hikes, relaxing with a book, sharing extended devotional time every morning with Beverly, playing an assortment of games with our friends,, sight-seeing...etc.

Decompressing!

Making time for what matters most

We are busy.

 Sometimes we are busy because it is simply what others expect us to be.  Caught up in the delusion that our value is determined by what others think of us, we are work at a frenzied pace to gain their approval.

Sometimes we are busy because we are busy.  We have a regular regimen of responsibility that is enough for us but, then, there are those unpredictable things that invade our time and space that require our attention as well.  we find ourselves unwittingly buried underneath an avalanche of unplanned responsibilities.

How do we navigate through such times of heightened activity and blatant busy-ness?  Where do we find time for the things that really matter?

I can talk about that as a "victim" of a hectic schedule made more unmanageable by my unwise decisions and unclear priorities.  Here are some suggestions that I'm trying to implement to make time for what matters most.

1.  Priortize what needs to be done today.  This requires meaningful life goals (life-coaching can help you with this) that will help you set appropriate boundaries.  This is bringing the short term demands in alliance with the long term directions you've chosen for yourself.

2.  Practice saying "no".  This simple word will help you close the door on unwelcome and unnecessary intruders that would rob you of time and energy.

3.  Pace yourself.  Allow yourself enough time to do what you need to do with the excellence that will give you a sense of satisfaction when you have completed the task.

4.  Protect yourself from feelings of guilt.  Identify the things that make you want to say "yes" begrudgingly when you recognize you should say "no".  I have had to word to rid myself of an arropgant messianic complex that has deluded me into thinking I can fix  everything!

5.  Plan time for yourself.  Write it into your schedule, or, it will never happen.  A rested "you" will make all of your appointments potentially more productive and all of your relationships potentially more meaningful.

It's all right to be busy...but not at the expense of missing what matters most.

Advcocating for Yourself--right or wrong?

Advocating for myself is not one of my strengths.

I don't want you to assume an extraordinary sense of personal humility for me.  On the contrary, I can advocate for myself pretty passionately...inwardly.

But I struggle with the legitimacy of doing that publicly, especially as  a man  imperfectly aspiring to be a servant of God in the pastoral ministry.

Now I am facing retirement, looking for new places of ministry and service.  And wondering how much to advocate for myself.

There are several good friends of mine who actively and aggressively challenge me to not be reluctant about "selling myself" in asking for reimbursement and compensation--a difficult task for me.  They have, in fact, advocated in my behalf--a humbling gift for which I am thankful.

I  have a missionary friend who refuses to ask for himself, but is reluctantly willing to let me (or others) ask for him.  I understand that in the context of my own current situation/.  He points to Paul who never asked for himself but asked for others.

I like asking for others.  One of the opportunities I have considered requires that I raise my own support--immediately subconsciously pre-empting that job from consideration given my mindset.  My point of possible re-evaluation is that I would be raising funds for the ministry of which my compensation is a part.

A technicality?

Probably.

Here's the deal.  In ministry, we testify that God has called us, and because of that we trust that He will provide for us.  I firmly believe that and have sought to live with that in mind.

However, I am confident that even though God will provide it is important for me to step out and follow His leading, walk through the doors He may be opening, and be willing to identify the gifts He has given me, and when asked, share what I need to provide for my family.

I guess that's advocating for myself.

I've decided I can do that, while not compromising my confidence in God and with the certainty that He will meet my needs...as He always has!

The "Demons" of Uncertainty

I like order and regimen.  I thrive in an environment of structure and predictability.

I'm a minister, however, and everything about my life demands spontanaiety--crisis and response tops the list. Inevitably, my best-laid plans falls prey to the tyranny of the urgent.  I am learning to set boundaries for myself (more on that later) or else I would disappear into a sea of chaos!

I face alot of uncertainty each day--and especially now, as I contemplate transition.  Let me share some of the "demons" I associate with this season of my life.     

U-nclear time constraints--I'm unsure what's going to happen will happen. 

N-ebulous details--I don't have enough information to make definitive plans.

C-alculated risks--I waffle at the thought of facing unknown challenges.

E-mpty places--I have gaps in my life unfulfilled in transition.

R-eflective grief--I look back and imagine what I could have done differently.

T-entative concentration--I allow my mind to wander into areas of non-productive worry

A-ssumed expectations--I make myself "crazy" wondering what might be expected of me.

I-nterrupted communication--I'm used to staying "in touch"; not everyone else feels the same need!

N-egative energy--I spend too much time fanatasizing about what may never happen.

T-rust deficit--I forget to focus on the promsies of God's Word.

Y-ielded faith--I walk in my own limited knowledge, compromising my professed faith in God.

What a mmiserable guy I can become in a matter of moments if I allow thre avalanche of ucnertainty to bury me!  Here's a familiar word of counsel from the Bible.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight"

Proverbs 3:5,6 (NIV)



Uncertainty is a certainty.  As we face the challenges of ech new days we must realize we cannot controil what happens; we can only control how we respond to each new situation.  The "demons" of uncertainty may seek to haunt us--and unprepared we could easily succumb to their potential paralyzing fear.

Or, we can arm ourselves with trust and faith in God who promsies to mae our paths "straight", even when we can't see what lies ahead. 

I need a jump start

More than once I've gone to my garage and found the car battery dead because I left something on overnight.  Fortunately, I can jump start the battery through the magic of a portable unit by simply hooking up, and in a matter of minutes I'm good to go.

So maybe we can "hook up" today and jump start you towards reaching some meaningful goals in 2012.  Let me anticipate a few alibis forming subconsciously in your mind...

"A month has already come and gone and I haven't even taken the first step!"

"I've been here before, and it always ends up the same."

"I don't even have enough time to even think about goals."

"So who's going to hold me accountable if I get started?"

"I'm not sure I have what it takes to follow through."

Sound familiar?  Are some of these words and phrases reverberating in your head?  If so, join the hundreds of others like you who are stuck in a rut and uncertain what they can do--if anything--to move forward.

Let's address each potential pitfall with something positive.

"It is never too late to start something worthwhile."

:"Let's change your history; let's do what you've been unable to do before...with God's help."

"We make time for the things that are important; how important is change in your life?"

"You can find someone who will hold you accountable." ( a life coach can fill that void)

"You have what it takes...let someone help you assess your strengths and weaknesses and chart a course with you for reaching your goals."

All you need is a jump start.  Let's "hook up" and get moving towards fulfilling your goals.