The suicide epidemic

Thirty per cent more baby boomers committed suicide over the last ten years than those the same age a decade before.

More teenagers die from suicide than from automobile accidents.

Staggering statistics that can be added to others heralding the gruesome truth that suicide is becoming an ever-increasing "way out" and "escape" from the rigors of life.

WHY?

Many reasons are suggested by the professionals--economic woes, joblessness, increased use of opiates, gender identity issues, the collapse of the traditional family unit, etc.

When Jesus said that His purpose was to bring us "abundant life" in John 10:10, many contemporary "teachers" chose to use that idea as a platform for what has been called the "health and wealth" gospel, i.e. "God wants you rich", "Christians should never be sick", etc.  Apart from the fact that this flies in the face of scripture, and that such a message would not play well in third world countries where disease and poverty abound, the challenge, then,  is to understand what an "abundant" and "full life" looks like.

A "full life" is understanding who I am and whose I am.  When I discover that I am God's workmanship (Ephesians 2:10) created by Him with a unique place and purpose, and pursue that relationship with Him (we know that He first pursues us with His love) and discover my purpose in Him--then I can begin to experience true fullness in my life as I follow Christ.

It's not easy.  This is not a ticket to a comfortable life nor is it the promise of problem-free living.  What it does give me is a prescription for life--how to live it rightly and how to build meaningful relationships that are supporting and sustaining.

I firmly believe that if we understood this, and the significance of Philippians 4:6-8 where we are encouraged to come to God with our problems in prayer with the promise, "...He will keep your hearts through Christ Jesus...", or, as another commentator suggested, "keep you sane"--we would embrace life, not despair of it.

Too many are living in the grip of hopelessness and despair. This week I have the privilege of speaking to those who have lost friends and family members to the tragedy of suicide.  My prayer is that I will be the voice of hope to those who have survived and are struggling to make sense of what happened.

Our hope is in the Lord.

What defines me?

I have been doing some soul-searching in recent weeks, whether walking on the beach, sitting on my patio, or sometimes, in the early hours of the morning when I can't sleep.  Here;'s the haunting question..."WHO AM I?"

I always defined that by what I did.  I am a pastor.  I am a Hospice chaplain.  I'm a part-time missionary to Haiti.  I'm a Christian counselor/coach, etc...  There was always a list of things that I did that seemed to define who I was.

It's different these days.  I am semi-retired with less responsibility and visibility--except for a sharpened look at myself--and I am not always pleased with what I see.

What defines me, I am remembering from what I've counseled others, is not what I do but who I am on the inside.  It is not who I appear to be in public when I am demonstrating my best behavior but who I am in the private place when no one--but God--sees me.

Scripture reminds us that while man is looking at the outside, God is checking out the inside.  And that can be scary to contemplate.

I've decided I really do know who I am.  I am a redeemed sinner, a child of God, a growing believer in need of spiritual food and fellowship and a joint heir with Christ.  That's a mouthful to contemplate but it is who I am, by God's grace.

How do you define yourself?

Join me in purposefully choosing not to recite what you do, but remembering who you are in Christ.

A new office, a new perspective

I can look out from my desk window and see the semi-industrial area around me, dotted with rows of dressy metal buildings with offices and businesses inside.  It reminds me that I am no longer in the sleepy confines of Amador County.  The locals here would argue, however, that this is paradise, a far cry from the bustling highways of Los Angeles three hours away.

It's a new perspective for me.

And I'm in a  brand new office with an architect, a therapist, a driving instructor and a landscape material order business around me.  An eclectic group.

I've been asking myself, "Am I a new me"?  Everything about my life seems so different--no pastoral responsibility, living space reduced from 2200 square feet to 1200 square feet (three bathrooms to one), discretionary time, anonymity in a new community...?

Who am I really?

Here's what I am re-discovering about myself...
1.  I cannot not work.
2.  I cannot not serve God.
3.  I cannot not be involved in ministry.

It's how God hard-wired me.

Here's to semi-retirement and the opportunity to reaffirm who I am..and get about the fulfilling pursuit of God's work here in San Luis Obispo County.

Update on Full-LifeCoaching

I have arrived in Arroyo Grande where Beverly and I are establishing our "new life", near eight of our grandchildren...and the ocean.

Here is some pertinent updated information for our friends and clients.

1.  I am doing Skype counseling an am available now for those out of the San Luis Obispo County area.

2.  We are retaining the same cell phone contact number, 209-403-2296, and email address, daleabarrett@gmail.com.

3.  My new office address is 636 Clarion Court, Suite 101, San Luis Obispo, 93401.  I'll be moving into that office August 20th and available for appointments August 26th.

4.  I am developing a new website that should be available in September, 2013.  It is             www.Full-LifeCoaching.org.

5.  I'll be speaking at a Suicide Survivor's Seminar at the American Legion Hall in Jackson, September 7th from 9 a.m.-noon.  I'll be joined by Liseanne Wick, Program Manager for Suicide Prevention and Crisis Services.  The seminar is free and is directed towards those who have lost friends and love ones through suicide.

I hope to keep in contact with you and invite you to communicate with me as we get re-established in our new community.

"Fed Up" or Filled Up?

I will be presenting a seminar June 18 and July 16 for a local business to its forty-plus employees about discovering a full life, entitled "Fed Up" or Filled Up?.  This seminar will be video-taped and may be made available to you along with a notebook of accompanying exercises.

If you are interested, contact me at daleabarrett@gmail.com

Closing and opening

Transition moves relentlessly forward.

1.  My Sutter Creek office of Full-LifeCoaching closed several weeks ago with termination of my lease after  a year there.

2.  My new office will be located at Grace Fellowship Church where I am currently sharing space graciously made available to me for the next two months.

3.  I am relocating in August in San Luis Obispo and will be opening a counseling-coaching office there.

It's hard to say "good-bye" to my clients.  In some cases they are moving on and are finding new confidence in their walk with the Lord.  Some have inquired about my returning monthly or keeping in contact via Skype or telephone.

Keeping you in the loop...

On not seeing clearly...

Over the past six months I have delayed needed cataract surgery and the result has been reflected in my ability to read and write coherently.  A month ago I finally had my cataract removed and today the optometrist told me I no longer need glasses.  Needless to say, I am euphoric about this great news.  No longer will I have to spend hours trying to remember where I left them nor will I have to take them off and put them on again depending on my work environment.

What a  blessing it is to see clearly.  The fuzziness caused by a well-developed cataract had caused my vision to be blurred, made computer work agonizingly slow and turned the joy of reading into a burdensome task.  Even as I sit at my computer now I am thanking God for His divine healing.

Much of life can be spent living in a  fog.  Often, we know what we need to do to find focus and clarity, but we put it off and try to manage, operating at less than peak efficiency.  For me, the issue was economics and the allurement of my 65th birthday and the benefits of medicare meant I could have the surgery done for nothing.  I didn't want to pay the cost of the surgery and so I opted to live the last six months in a quagmire of frustration and inefficiency.  When I look back--and I can see it clearly now--I wish I had "bitten the bullet" and done the surgery, even at my own expense.  It would have been worth it to skip the fog and darkness.

What do you know to do that you are not doing, and what are you procrastinating  because you're simply not willing to pay what it costs?  You may find all kinds of self-justification in not moving forward now--"It will be easier later", or, "I can make this work for now even though it's not my best work".  In the end, the cost of not doing it now may be greater.

There are promises in God's Word about living in the moment. "God mercies are new every morning" , Give us our daily bread, and "Today is the day of salvation..."  are examples of God's available resources now.

You can choose to live in a fog, not seeing clearly, procrastinating what needs to be done.

Or, you can do the hard costly work now and enjoy the immediate benefits of God's promised provision...and a clear vision for what He can do now to bring clarity and focus to your life.