Our lead pastor at Grace spoke from the book of Philemon Sunday about reconciliation and it reminded me of the importance of reconciliation in the context of our daily relationships. Let me identify some basic truths I've learned about communication that enter in to all potential conflict resolution.
1. The goal of confrontation should always be reconciliation.
2. The difference between reacting and responding is time.
3. Speak the truth in love.
4. Don't be resigned to unresolved conflict, which leads to bitterness and resentment; be resolved to address it with the purpose of reconciliation.
5. Process your anger appropriately--don't suppress and repress anger; rather express it (appropriately) and confess it (acknowledge it).
Each of these principles are worth exploring more deeply. In the realm of life-coaching these are often critical components of .moving past our failures towards healing and wholeness, enabling us to take intentional steps towards greater peace and productivity.
Interested in finding out more? Contact me at daleabarrett@mail.com.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
From the heat to the heat
We just returned from a week in the desert where the temperature several days was near 110 degrees. Of course, the old joke is, "It's a dry heat", but it was hot. It was tempered by the fact we were on vacation, we sat around the swimming pool jumping in as needed to be refreshed, and generally sat in air-conditioned rooms when we weren't outside. It was hot but lots of fun...free from the routine and responsibilities of busy life.
In the heat but away from the heat.
Coming home always means lots of dreaded tasks--unpacking, washing clothes, and getting caught up. I am no longer the "head honcho" where I am employed as senior pastor but our lead pastor now carries the weight of the day-to-day decisions, and he is doing that well.
Interestingly enough it was 48 degrees when I stepped outside this morning and it has been in the low 70's here...almost cool, like a typical fall day here. But I came home to the heat..
Work is like that--long-distance counseling, resetting a schedule to fit in the requests for meetings, catch-up correspondence, administrative tasks, and a faulty computer that resulted in a dash to nearby Staples to find an instant fix...a temporary band-aid, as I've wrestled with computer malfunction all day.
From the heat into the heat. A typical transition. An expected climate when returning from vacation.
Here's the good news. It's 2:30 pm, and after seven and a half hours my list is almost all checked off. Everything is getting done, all the "fires" have been doused, and the rest of the week has been, hopefully, scheduled with time to cool off penciled in.
In the heat but away from the heat.
Coming home always means lots of dreaded tasks--unpacking, washing clothes, and getting caught up. I am no longer the "head honcho" where I am employed as senior pastor but our lead pastor now carries the weight of the day-to-day decisions, and he is doing that well.
Interestingly enough it was 48 degrees when I stepped outside this morning and it has been in the low 70's here...almost cool, like a typical fall day here. But I came home to the heat..
Work is like that--long-distance counseling, resetting a schedule to fit in the requests for meetings, catch-up correspondence, administrative tasks, and a faulty computer that resulted in a dash to nearby Staples to find an instant fix...a temporary band-aid, as I've wrestled with computer malfunction all day.
From the heat into the heat. A typical transition. An expected climate when returning from vacation.
Here's the good news. It's 2:30 pm, and after seven and a half hours my list is almost all checked off. Everything is getting done, all the "fires" have been doused, and the rest of the week has been, hopefully, scheduled with time to cool off penciled in.
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