How can we process issues that are of importance that are often difficult to resolve? Left unaddressed they potentially can lead to anger, alienation and anxiety in our relationships. God's Word helps us with this simple admonition in Proverbs 12:18, "Reckless words pierce like a sword but the tongue of the wise brings healing".
We are invited in James 1:5 to come to God with this carte blanc promise, "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask of God who gives generously without finding fault and it will given to him." James 3 addresses the power of the tongue and concludes in 3:13-18 with these principles.
1. Our wisdom is reflected in our humility, 3:13.
2. "Bitter envy" and "selfish ambition" produce a wisdom that is "earthly, unspiritual and of the devil", 3:15.
3. "Disorder" (sometimes experienced as dis-unity) results from ignoring God's wisdom and embracing "worldly" wisdom", 3:16.
4. God's wisdom is "pure, then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere", 3:17.
5. The product of endeavoring to "sow in peace" is a "harvest of righteousness", or, right living, 3:18.
Why not rewrite these verses in your own words? From verse 17 make a list of all of the descriptive phrases for godly wisdom and use these as a way of defining how you will communicate when divisive issues are on the table.
And then say "grace"...because it's essential to the process of resolution.
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